you could see the shadows of two individuals behind the plastic-made curtain
almost similar in every way; unless the left one was slightly taller with a messier hair and the right one had a more defined facial features.
“we used to have a blue couch.” she whispered “but it’s now broken and truly resembles my grandma as a person.”
“how can a broken chair resemble your grandma as a person?” he said, completely fail to understand the history of a broken couch that resembled an old lady. a total nonsense.
but to her, the answer was evident  and under the glimmering light of their tiny and poorly organized bathroom, everything immediately became something that was in need of explaination.
“it’s not the kind of couch that is covered by a piece of artificial leather. ours was less special; the cover was rough rather than smooth and everyone could feel the…

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to the most precious human in my world (c.f.)

it’s 2:44 am right now and the night is growing deeper;

i can’t sleep, so i start thinking of you over and over.

i fell in love with you on a cold day of september;

the moment i laid my eyes on you, my life changed forever;

but back then, i have no clue that i want you to be my lover;

i just want you to be around me. and that’s what matter.

my whole life before you happened is such a blur;

and future without you seems boring, uncertain, duller.

i am really-foolishly in love with you and i have never been so certain about something, so sure.

for years i questioned love & lust and tried to seek my own desire, to find what’s worth. and honey, you are the answer,

you are my saviour,

you are my disaster,

and i think i’ll love you forever.

everyday sexism.

This is a post that sums up all of my thoughts. Good job nat 👏👏🙌🙌


I want to create something that makes people feel something, a thought-provoking kind of writing. This is why I am so inspired by Laura Bates, a British feminist writer and the founder of ‘Everyday Sexism Project’, to be a part of her campaign. The main purpose of everyday sexism project is to document all forms of sexism that people often experience on a daily basis. I found out about her project through a Ted Talk, watching Laura talked about her very own experience of sexism had made me realize one thing. And then, I had to give myself a quite break to think of any of those things that Laura mentioned during her talk.

Being raised by three amazing women was nothing but a blessing, so growing up was easy. As a young woman and a daughter myself, the way I see this problem has changed throughout the years. Back…

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Bi // 2

Unspoken Thoughts

Semua ini hanyalah kisah fiksi belaka.

Kata – kata “ kamu akan baik – baik saja, “ merupakan omong kosong. Sang pencipta berkata lain. Siapa yang bisa melawan takdirnya?

Ia tidak pernah baik – baik saja. Selama ini merupakan sandiwara. Seandainya ia seorang actor, mungkin ia sudah memenangkan piala Oscar.

Setiap hari ia berharap sang pencipta akan bermurah hati dan menuliskan takdir baru baginya. Ia tidak perlu takdir yang terlalu bagus. Asal tidak seburuk takdirnya sekarang, ia sudah puas. Namun tampaknya, sang pencipta memutuskan belum saatnya untuk menulis cerita baru.

Mengapa ia harus dijadikan tokoh utama dalam sebuah cerita yang bagai mimpi buruk? Tak bisakah ia menjadi tokoh utama dalam cerita dongeng yang memiliki ibu peri baik hati? Bukannya ibu peri baik hati, sang pencipta justru memasangkannya dengan penyihir jahat. Setidaknya, tidak bisakah sang pencipta mendatangkan pangeran baik hati untuk menyelamatkannya dari neraka ini?

Sialnya, sang pencipta merasa inilah yang…

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deep dark thoughts

someone ever asked me, “do you ever think of killing yourself?

to think of it, i never.

im too afraid of blood, pain, and knife. i dont like the thoughts of hanging myself with a rope. i despised pills and guns.

instead, i imagined someone threw a knife at my throat and left me bled to death.

some nights, i thought about bad things, very bad things.

midnights, where monsters and demons waiting for their prey

cold hands trying to grasp my hopes and crushed it to pieces

desperately wanting to be saved

love, an enigma that even one cant decipher

what i have been thinking about lately is escape, escape, escape.

i wish i could stop thinking those.

best regards gro

n thanks to avant garde for the words.

im gonna post happy things soon.

us, silence, and nostalgia

June 15th 2017

it was the best day i have ever had. all 6 of us are there. i felt complete.

we were having so much fun despite one of us has to go somewhere far away.

i love all the things we do that day. when we were shopping, getting wet from the rain, making foods, eating together.

but my favorite part is when we all bundled up in a bed. just laying and having silence surround us.


because in that moment, i thought of us, thought about times we spend with each other, having good times and bad times, being together, being happy together. 

because i cant help but thinking that it maybe the last time we will be together. one of us will leave soon, and maybe in the next school year we would not be in the same class again.

because i have realized that i adore and love these girls so much.

i really miss them now. gonna hug them the next time we meet.

sincerely, nisa.

dream pt.1

i dreamt of kissing uma thurman.

i remember the dream as clear as a crystal though it happened days, even weeks ago.

i was dancing in the dance floor. the lights were dim. the musics were lively. it was perfect.

she was dancing beside me in a beautiful black dress whilst i was being a fool and kept on slipping from my red skirt.

seeing me like that, she then took my hand and dragged me to the changing room.

i was startled at first but relaxed when i knew that she just wanted to help me with that damn skirt.

so, she took off her own black skirt and offered it to me. i refused it because it meant she has nothing to wear. 

upon seeing my hesitant, she assured me by showing her other dress. it was a purple dress. purple. it was the ugliest purple dress i have ever seen in my dreams. who can wear those?

however i was proven wrong when i saw her with that dress. the ugly dress had turned into the most beautiful. 

she was so gorgeous and so ethereal that it made me silent for a while. just staring at her.

feeling so awestrucked and amazed, i walked closer to her and pecked her lips. i kissed uma thurman in my dream and it was the best thing. 

im such a sucker for kisses and uma thurman and kisses from uma thurman.

p. s. : the amount of the words ‘uma thurman’ and ‘kiss’ are so overwhelming and too much. im sorry.

nighty night, my love

fast asleep and snug ahead.

goodnight, little sleepyhead.

now the toys are put away,

it’s time to dream of yesterday.

and what will morning bring to you?

a whole new day with lots to do.

so sleep in peace, in slumber sound,

until the busy day comes around.



not mine, found it in a piece of paper in my room.


i sometimes think about you.
about your mesmerizing eyes.

your soft hands.

your calming fragrance.

your lovely smile

your sweet laugh.

i think you are amazing.
well, actually more that that.

you are heavenly ethereal.

inexplicably gorgeous.

irresistably adorable.

intoxicatingly attractive.
i think,
i think too much of you.